What does that title make you think of? Perhaps the advert for Fairy liquid? Or cream, or cooking oil? For me, this week a little something went a very long way indeed.
A really lovely friend died 2 weeks ago and her funeral was this week. She was young, not even 40, and died in incredibly sad circumstances leaving a very young daughter to be raised by granny. As you can imagine, all the emotions popped up for this.
On the day of the funeral, I expected to be steadfast and to do my crumbling once home and in private. (I think this stems from years ago, being held down by depression and feeling that, if I let out any tears, then I might not be able to stop and may drown.) But I woke on the day with an inner tremble and feared tears might not just weep out but pour. And then…
I’d booked a taxi and allowed double the time I needed. A white haired, softly spoken man with a gentle lilting accent came to meet me - his entire demeanour was calming. We chatted about a mix up of address and he saw me into the cab. He asked, “What’s it today then, a nice lunch?” (just to clarify, I’m rarely in a taxi and we don’t know each other!) I said it was sadly a sad occasion, a funeral. I had to take a quick breath then and clamp my teeth to hold myself in… too soon in the day to fall apart! I said I’d over-allowed time and there was no hurry. From then on, I was under his wing and he said “Well then we’ll just take our time”.
He drove and talked me through his lucky day the day before, we laughed about it, he told me about his friend who had died young, we talked about his early starts, his typical days and his daughter who started her nursing career as Covid burst out and of how proud he is of her. He asked me a little about my friend and I told him some of the stunning achievements she’d had in her very short life.
When we pulled up at my destination, he calmly walked around to see me off. He smiled and said “I’d like to say have a good time but…” and shrugged. He’d been amazing, he didn’t really do all that much, but how he did it was huge and it meant the world to me. He’d given me solidity and strength that would see me over the next hour or two. I thanked him for keeping me calm and told him he’d been wonderful. And then I headed in, and he headed on.
I wasn’t without tears during the service, but I had enough in the tank to be sure they could be weeping ones and not bursting ones. Never underestimate what little acts of support do for others, even simply just a smile. I won’t forget him.
I hope a little goes a long way for you today.
The room above the garage
A Moodscope member.