I was recently triggered to think about the notion of "safety". To me this conjures up the notion of feeling safe from harm and danger in both a physical and emotional sense. It's taken me a long time to realise that the biggest threat to my own safety, recently, has been my mind. Thought processes have kept me stuck from letting go of an unhealthy situation for far too long, eroding my self confidence and self worth along the way. For quite some time my mind has been full of guilt and self doubt; negativity that has been harming my emotional well-being. Acknowledging this has felt quite empowering, I'm beginning to realise that I can work to take the control back from my mind to reduce the harm it has been causing.

I attended a meditation course recently which has really helped me grow my understanding of why it is such a useful tool and how it can help to let go of painful emotions and reduce negative thoughts.

I now use an imagery of the ocean to help me. The bottom of the deep sea is my mind. It is a vast and unobstructed space. It is always calm there, unaffected by anything happening up above. The negative thoughts, the painful emotions that come up, cause movements on the waters surface. The quantity and intensity is reflected in the ferocity of the sea. It could be a gentle ripple of the water or an almighty storm with waves crashing everywhere. Regardless, the bottom of the ocean remains calm and unaffected by the changes above.

It is comforting to know that this calm space is always there, always available to retreat to. Taking myself there when the sea gets too rough, even if just for 10 minutes, will offer me, if nothing else, respite from the negative mind state. However, whilst there experiencing the peace and expanse of the mind, free from the intrusive thoughts, there will be space and clarity that can assist in dealing with whatever is causing the storm up above. The more I take myself into the bottom of the ocean, the better equipped I will be to cope with what's on the surface.

If I reflect back upon this year it is clear that I was in the midst of a very dangerous storm, it was relentless and ferocious. But I have fought hard against the storm, using several resources and guidance to find the bottom of the deep deep sea and gradually the storm is quietening down. It is teaching me that my thoughts and feelings can't cause me any harm if I don't allow them to. They are formless, colourless, can't be seen or touched. The clear space of my mind is beautiful, a safe place to be.

Rosie

A Moodscope member.