It's been a strange year. Like many of us, I assume, mine has been spent partly consumed with the unfolding and scary events of the world and the sadness that you see when the TV is on. I can't escape it as my husband likes to watch the news and keep up to date.

I started off the year determined to leave my second job (the steady one that brings in a regular income) which seemed to just be full of negatives. I steer my own ship as a self employed person, occasionally feeling like I am going to break the waves or have them break me. It's difficult to fit in and adjust to all the “politics” and mixture of moaning minnies, slackers and the odd hard worker. You know exactly who is swinging the lead and the boss knows too. I had an excellent boss and got on well with her.

I became a home help instead and gave up the other role in summer and started my new wee business after getting a couple of clients from a friend and it has gently grown. There is much more work out there I can tell you. I have also seen how outstandingly brave many of the clients are, faced with loneliness, the decline in health of their loved ones (and themselves) and the general chaos of the world. It makes you very humble doing this job and it is immensely rewarding. A busy time with the funerals then saw me actually fold a little mentally, in between putting an offer in for a house in June. Combined with family issues with an ongoing probate issue and worrying health developments for my husband's sister and subsequent lack of communication, we have been rather stressed. The first buyer for our house it transcribed had a history of pulling out so the initial move date of 1st September became a distant memory. The second buyer lost his job so that put us back... whilst the others whose house we wanted patiently waited. In the end, two offers came through and we went with first time buyers and friends of ours. I kept saying that I wanted the house to go to people that loved it and had a family.... which is exactly what happened. My husband bought me a ring with the emblem that is on our new house plaque on it and each morning I kissed the ring. I kept the positivity up and told myself it would happen, despite all the setbacks.

A client who I worked for passed away and I was asked to take his funeral which was very sad and I support his wife as a home help. This is the huge downside of the job that if the clients are a certain age, they may at sometime go. I remain committed to the role as with the funerals but am taking on less work with the latter, as I need to get myself together a little.

We now have a final moving date thankfully and are working towards that. I always feel bad and guilty about feeling stressed when there is so much pain, terror and anguish in the world. However, I know I need to listen to my body and my mind when I take on too much and I need to limit my absorption of world events, that secondary sadness and know when it is time to rest. I'm still working on self care.

How has your year been and what have you learnt from it?

Liz

A Moodscope member