I wonder how you interpret being close to someone. We are asked, especially when someone dies “Were you close?” There are several ways of looking at it really. Sometimes I think I'm not close to anybody at all!

But if a distant friend has died, or a friend is grieving or in trouble, it can have such a huge impact on me, does that mean we were/are close?

I have always struggled with love. I loved (and will always love) my dogs, each and every one of them that I have looked after over the years. There are five in total. Losing the last two has hit me like a tonne of bricks.

I have two half-brothers, one from each of my parents. Being twelve years old when they were born, literally two months apart, I had (and still have) a very special bond with one of them. Like a second mummy, I nurtured him and adored him for six years.

But then I had to leave home for my own sanity at 18.

If only I could have taken him with me!

Mother and step father then left the country with him for six years. I missed out on his childhood but he used to record tapes and send them to me. We have kept that close relationship, me and my brilliant little brother. He lives away now (in this country but the place they ended up in before they moved again). He had no roots in this area but he made some friends in one place and decided to stay there.

So, I don¹t see him as often as I would like, yet that bond we have, will never go. If I wanted to save one person in the world, it would be him.

I ponder on this question of closeness when it comes to my parents. They are my parents after all. I moan about them and there is a lack of contact, real love and common sense, but I will miss them when they are gone. They divorced when I was eight and unfortunately this brought many barriers along the way. There was no need and there still isn’t, but that is the way it is.

Am I close to my husband? I guess I must be, I don’t think I could be without him!

What is your perception of being close?

Molly xx

A Moodscope member.