I read Moodscope every day and have done for quite some time now. It has helped me so much through darker times of my depression but also on good days. I could talk about so many things, but I think I would like to mention the topic 'Relationships'. A conversation I had with my mother today, which involved tears and laughter.

So I have been single for seven years now, have two amazing kids, independent person, job, drive, like holidays and meeting up with friends. But there is a 'But'. I often think after unsuccessful dates over the seven years, am I going to be alone forever? Will I meet someone on my wavelength? I'm not abnormal to think this way am I? Surely people aren't all about themselves and selfish for just them.

This year has challenged me in relationships, not just a male companion who yet again wandered out of my life after many promises, but the other relationship I've been hurt by is a long term and this is a 30+ year female friendship whom I have shared lots with, who has sadly departed from our friendship about 4 months ago now. What a blow, I didn't expect it and its really knocked me quite alot. Analysing all our messages, looking at photos, I've questioned the friendship, has it ever been real? I know on my part it was, but never did I think I would question it. So this has knocked my mental health a bit and although it all probably reads a little bit higgledy piggledy I'm sure you understand...

Claire

A Moodscope member.