I've not written for a long while again. But I read daily all your amazing, insightful and encouraging blogs. Thank you for your gifts of words which help so much.

I hit a real low couple of weeks ago. It's complicated and long to share, but in this place I wrote this poem.  It helps me to write things out when I get triggered by things, and poems or journaling help me express unexplainable feelings. I then feel I get some understanding. And that inside place gets some relief, and then it settles down again.

I'm not in this place now, but it left me tender for a fair few days. I'm aware it's a part of me that holds pain and distress, not the whole of me, and I'm not always conscious of it until I get triggered again.

I hope that you all can find ways of relieving distress when it hits you too.

Cross words 

Cross words

Crossing worlds 

Mixed up

Mixed messages 

Crossed lines 

Mixed up spaces 

Confusion

Third parties

A tangled mess

A tangled web 

Enmeshed

Interweaved

Entwined

What’s the truth? 

Where’s the clarity?

I get confused

I can’t see clearly

It’s not clear

 don’t know

I don’t get it

But I feel it

I feel the confusion

The unclearness

The uncomfortableness 

The uneasiness

The distress

The tension

Who am I?

Who are you?

What is me and what is you?

What have I done?

Am I to blame?

I feel to blame.

I feel guilty and ashamed.

Embarrassed 

Raw

Seen

Judged 

Condemned 

Crushed

The sting of ridicule

The raw pain of judgement 

Not accepted

Not acceptable

So go quiet 

Hide away 

Withdraw 

Safer then 

Say nothing 

Do nothing

Hidden in the shadows 

No-one can see me then 

No-one can hurt me then

Safer but alone 

Oh so lonely

Help me please

I need some help

I need some love 

Don’t ignore me

But don’t criticise me 

And don’t judge me 

Please accept me.

Warm wishes

Maggie Jane

A Moodscope member