Depressive's Guide to the Wedding Season.

16 Jun 2015

Despite being a hopeless romantic, I confess, I don't "do" weddings terribly well. No, it's not because I'm 37, still single, and the prospect that every face will read: 'Ah bless, you must wish this was you dear?' (Arrrrrrgh!) No, I just don't enjoy large gatherings of people; I never have. (Nor do I care much for all the tradition of weddings: the first dance, the wedding cake, the photographs, bridesmaids,...and I'm afraid this bride would so be giving a speech!)

So, how to cope?

Do what works for you.

I used to feel it was only right and proper to be on form for every last part of the day. Not anymore. Take the evening, for example. I don't dance (at least not in public) but if I don't dance, I can't converse (on account of the music's volume) and if I can't converse, well, I must sit there with an affected smile or else folk will think me a miserable singleton sucking sour grapes. It's tedious, no?

No, I'm not letting the side down by slipping away before the evening party in preference of a quiet evening. The same goes for feeling you must hang around for the interminable "Photo Shoot" (you'll find me snoozing in a quiet corner).

Do what works for you.

Don't fret about expensive gift giving.

If you have oodles of cash then by all means make the newly wed's day. If money is tight just now, remember this: it won't be the most expensive gifts that the couple will cherish the most. Be creative with your giving ideas (Pinterest is great for this). Your friends will know when a gift has come from a place of genuine thought, love and affection.

Put your phone away and keep it away.

In all probability the happy couple have spent no little amount of time and energy, to say nothing of expense, in order to give their friends and family a beautiful day. The least I can do in return then - even if feeling unsociable - is to try and put myself out there a bit. Seek out those looking a bit lost or alone (the bride and groom can't look after everybody, all day, all of the time) or take some quirky, impromptu photographs. Who knows, I may even meet my Martin Shaw slash Tom Hughes slash Stanley Tucci (I know. Told you I was a mass of contradictions!).

Easy on the liquor.

Alas, for me, the anxiety after a big event can be acute. If I've remained sober-minded I'll surely have less to overthink.

I'm also aware that when I'm nervous or overtired (or just downright happy, actually) I can give off hyperactive vibes. This can be misunderstood as "drunk" (I hate that!). A lemonade for me please.

What helps you to keep smiling through a large scale celebration?


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