Counselling figures in many blogs and posts. In many cases, for severe depression in particular, they are vital. People have personal trainers/shoppers. These are usually expensive, but it's a huge industry. I have seen cases of extreme manipulation, and often the 'patient', or 'client' needs to 'cut the cord' despite the risk, or when they become too dependent.

I was sent to an allergy clinic (in fact I had a lifetime's intolerance to dairy products). The woman practised at the most expensive London hospital – she became a 'guru'. A year later she was exposed in a Panorama type programme as a completely untrained charlatan.

We went to Marriage Guidance (now relate) at a particularly difficult time. The service was excellent – what we learned was that we were foundering on: failure to take time off as we built up a business, bitter disagreements on discipline of our daughters (they left home in a huff anyway) and perennial money worries. How many marriages fall at these hurdles?

When I was classified 'manic depressive' I was sent to an excellent psychotherapist, also a priest. One of my problems had been a hyper-critical mother-in-law who bullied me for 25 years. I never said a word to my husband. This therapist said 'what do you want to do to her?' He then put a pouffee in the middle of the room and I bunged all the cushions at it. End of treatment!

At that time I also went to an excellent psychiatrist. He did not tread softly, but said 'You are not marriage material'. Who is? None of my ideas could have come to fruition, married or not, as a woman could NOT make it at that era (late 1960's I think). I had no qualifications either.

At Samaritans we were forbidden to 'counsel' we were untrained. We would give information – on Shelter, places for battered wives, and otherwise just listen. Latest cynicism, an awful aggressive woman came up wanting to sell our house – terrible manner – she does psychotherapy 'on line'. Can anyone do this with no training?

How do you merit counselling?

The Gardener

A Moodscope member.