Everyone seems to be doing it, so why not me?

Well there is no good reason other than:

A) Being bothered

B) Feeling like it won't be any good

C) What is the point- how does it help?

D) What will I write about?

All of the above have been good reasons until now not to write something... but they are no longer thoughts that serve me, so I'm trying to get rid of them and actually do SOMETHING.

I'm writing this sitting in my tiny backyard with the warm of the Spring sunshine on my back. The very few birds we seem to have around are chirping to each other. 'Here or here?' I imagine them saying when considering the eves of which house to nest in.

Listening to the birds, I'm reminded of how much better I feel when chatting however briefly, randomly or deeply with another person.

For me social anxiety and fear of 'putting my foot in it' when talking to others keeps me isolated and at home rather too often.

I am at a crossroads in life just now and I want to step forward with enthusiasm and courage but taking the first steps to a new beginning is often a hurdle I can't jump. I know I need to make more and deeper connections with those around me and others I haven't even met yet.

What is it I fear, you ask? Well it's routed in judgement I am starting to think. Will I be boring company with limited small talk? No interesting anecdotes to share as I barely see anyone or try new things.

It's a vicious circle – no new experiences, nothing to talk about, nothing to share when I do meet people and no meeting of new people as I'm not getting out there to meet anyone!

I'd really appreciate any suggestions as to how to get out and meet new people without feeling foolish, stupid, inadequate, that they might think I'm boring, uninteresting, ugly, not worth being a friend to.

So there, I've done it, I've written a blog and I hope it's the first of lots I'll write as I've always wanted to be a writer, but I need those new experiences too in order to have something else to write about; so your suggestions about overcoming the anxiety of getting out there truly are welcome.

Ellie

A Moodscope member