I am far from perfect.

Saturday August 16, 2014

First of all: English is not my mother tongue, so please excuse any wrong words, any strange sounding sentence or just the fact that this text will not be perfect.
There we are, this is what I am struggling with. I am far from perfect.

I do not expect myself to be perfect; perfect meaning without any fault. I just expect myself to be more often my better self than my sad, depressed, destructive, idle, angry, non-productive self.

That is why I do not think that it would just be enough to stop wanting to be perfect. I think it is a good thing, that I do not want to be the depressed me.

There are all these simple truths out there, which sound reasonable: just be yourself, you do not have to achieve something to be loveable, your friends love you just the way you are, do not judge your feelings... and many more. It all sounds very nice.

But I can not find it logically:

When I am just myself, I am most of the time struggling with me and everything around me.
When I do not achieve anything - like doing sports, have some results at my job, not arguing with my boyfriend – I feel like I've failed.

My (not too many) friends sometimes do not like my negative attitude (and I understand).
I think, when I just accept my bad feelings, I will give up fighting them; because it is much easier to just let it happen. To be angry, to explode, to just lay around, to be impatient.

Instead I find my truth more logically: I am not a very happy person, thus I have to try to be a better person in order to become happy more often.

This is what I try to do every day to become a better person, to find the best possible way of being myself. On bad days it just means stopping myself from thinking that the world would be a better place without me. On the rare good days, it means that I am even able to make somebody else happy.

On days like that I actually understand these simple truths. Then, it is not about achieving something, judging my feelings or wanting to be perfect. I just am. And it is fun.

Remembering that those days exist, helps a lot on the bad days and with trying to become a happier person.

I hope all of you have those good days to remember. And I hope that for all of you the good days are far more often than the bad days.

Have a good day today.

A Moodscope user.


Comments are viewable only by members. Register Now to participate in the discussion.

Already have an account? Login to leave a comment.

There are 11 comments so far.

What is Moodscope?

Moodscope members seek to support each other by sharing their experiences through this blog. If you’d like to receive these daily posts by email, just sign up to Moodscope now, completely free of charge.

Moodscope is an innovative way for people to treat their own low mood problems using an engaging online tool. Anyone in the world can accurately assess and track daily mood scores over a period of time. We have proved that the very act of measuring, tracking and sharing mood can actually lift it. Join now.

Blog Archive


Posts and comments on the Moodscope blog are the personal views of Moodscope members, they are for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice. Moodscope makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this blog or found by following any of the links.

Moodscope will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information nor for the availability of this information. The owner will not be liable for any losses, injuries, or damages from the display or use of this information.