I have just had a more miserable evening meal than usual (food OK). Two weeks ago a ‘new’ lady arrived, we got chatty, and the big boss said would I sit with her for the first meal, which is an ordeal. I got stuck with her. Not that my previous companions were lively. She is depressed, widowed last year (husband 89) family never help. I DO, from Moodscope and own experiences understand, respect and sympathise with depression. But she acted as though she was the sole person to suffer grief. She has money, family near, and had her dog with her. She is just one of many who complain bitterly about undutiful children. But if, whenever they phone, they just get a long wail about how awful life is you have to be a very patient, loving child/grandchild to willingly go and visit the care home. 

I am feeling a huge gulf between being a resident/inmate and the ‘boss’ side of the fence. I do not haunt the reception desk, just notice things never done, and question why. Problem solving, real or in puzzle books meat and drink to me. A lady at my table, wrist broken, badly mended, quite frail, does not eat because she cannot cut up her food. Stupid things, no water glasses, only tall wine glasses. We have thick table mats, lady starting Parkinsons does not drink, scared of tipping glass over. Waitresses are super, but overwhelmed, they will help but people too timid to ask. Conversely, a small percentage have the attitude ‘We’ve paid, we will demand anything going.’ They give the serving staff hell. I said ‘If it were me I’d tip the bowl of salad over their heads and resign’. They are sorely tempted but need the money. 

We have a meeting to discuss food quality and service, it will be one big moan with everybody shouting at once. I have tried to prepare a ‘paper’ to try and define where real problems lie. Just general – ‘it gets worse all the time’. I tried to explain to seemingly receptive people that if the prices are put up there will be a rebellion. Lots of people seem to have stopped any interest in the outside world. Inflation? What’s that. Crazy climate conditions have caused shortages and high prices of many fresh products, not understood. 

Zimmer frame management is a hoot (if it did not cause so much aggro). Many people have to be helped, down to serving staff again. Always seem to be loads of management, no idea what they manage. Surely, for the ten minutes before and after meals somebody could be detailed to cope with zimmer frames? I have given them four original paintings by local artists, still stood in a corner. Four hooks all that is needed. Handyman never in evidence except at frequent ciggy breaks. So, although content with my decision, say so often ‘What on earth am I doing here?’ 

The Gardener

A Moodscope member