It used to be the other way round. A few days of depression and it would ease off. It would last a few weeks, at the worst. These days it's months of depression and a few days off here and there... if I'm lucky.
I am now in remission. It's been five days and yes I'm counting. It feels like a mini high. I just felt I wanted to share the extreme difference it makes for me personally when coming out of a depression and I am hoping others will be able to relate.
I'm looking at my house that I detested, I was repeatedly worried about how I would keep on top of all that needed doing. Now, out of depression, I think my house is not so bad after all and I will be able to do all of those things that need doing in time.
This is a big one, I don't feel I need to drink alcohol to numb the demons in my head! I had started drinking in the daytime, as it was the only thing that helped. Well that has broken the vicious circle as we all know alcohol doesn't help depression.
My appetite has improved. This is a real plus as I am underweight and I have missed food (for a long time) this was also due to physical health reasons but I am sure the depression played a big part and I am just hoping it is all coming together.
Recently, I mentioned I couldn't listen to music. I'm now listening to music and it's not affecting me, I am enjoying it, this is a real relief for me as I had stopped enjoying anything.
Might sound strange to some, but commercial adverts, I couldn't tolerate them, I think it was the jingles mainly. They now don't bother me. Well they are still annoying, but not to the same extent. Many other things irritated me so much...
Positive suggestions, on here or elsewhere, were impossible for me to carry out, when in the depression. I now feel that I can try these suggestions, hopefully to help maintain this state of mind.
Who knows how long it will last. It just intrigues me, this illness. Nothing happened, nothing changed. I still have the same problems, with the same circumstances.
But right now, I'm embracing every living moment. I feel like I am alive again.
I would love to hear from members with their own experiences of depression and whether you know what causes it or whether it just comes and goes for no apparent reason.
Love
Molly xx
A Moodscope member.
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