My friend decided she was never going to feel guilty and so be different from her mother and the rest of her family. I envy and admire her ability to live a guilt free life.
People say when you 'feel guilty' you think that you have done something wrong and are judging yourself. I agree to a point as I usually feel guilty when someone else tells me I have done something wrong. Therefore as psychologists say that guilt is a condition response not an real feeling or emotion. I find this confusing - does it matter if it is a reaction/response or an emotion/feeling?
As a child I felt guilty because there were starving children in the world and I had enough to eat. I did not feel guilty till my parents told me about the poor children who did not have much to eat.
When I hurt someone's feelings, or someone has told me I have upset them I feel bad. I become upset and if possible apologize to the person. If they won't accept my apology I feel guilty and upset and then I worry.
Counsellors say the only way to end guilt is to stop making you or others wrong. They say it is simple. Stop the judgments that you or anyone else is wrong and then you will be able to relax. I think that is too simple, if I have spent a lifetime feeling guilty I don't think I can stop the guilt cold turkey!
I read an article that said there is no right or wrong, only experiences to learn from. It encourages us to toss guilt out. Trust yourself. What do you think?
Do you live a guilt free life? Have you always or have you changed?
Do you believe that guilt is not a feeling.?
Do you think it is possible to change easily a life time of 'feeling' guilty?
Do you think changing one's way of thinking about guilt will take a long time?
A Moodscope member.
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