When I was young, I remember saying to my mum "I am depressed". I wasn't sure of the true meaning of the word, but I knew something was horribly wrong.

"So am I" she said.

"But you are married" I said.

"Doesn't make any difference" she said.

Of course she was right.

Thankfully, I do not believe she suffered too badly, but for me, it was a cry for help.

Putting depression aside, now I am married myself, I often think about that comment.

I feel people do not bother as much as they used to... because I am married. Perhaps it is because they feel they are interfering and do not want to disturb you.

Friends come and go for many reasons, life moves on, people have other commitments etc.

But we still need our friends, whether it be for their support or to support them.

I rather like being needed. I don't want people to think I have enough on my plate or that they cannot ask for help... because I am married.

There is another side of the coin...

I once phoned a friend (many years ago) when I was in complete distress, she said to me she couldn't come to me 'because she was married'. I actually never forgave her for that.

Personally, I would be there for someone I cared about, if they were in need.

Married or not.

Would you find it easier seeking help from a single friend with little or no commitments? Or do you feel like you do not want to trouble them regardless?

Toss the coin over and people say "I will always be there for you." Do they mean it?

We are often told to put ourselves first and learn to say 'No'.

So I am interested, would you be there for a friend or family member in need? Would you feel inconvenienced? Too busy? Ready to make an excuse?

Or do you actually get satisfaction out of being needed and helping someone?

Molly

A Moodscope member.