Ever since I was a young boy I have been plagued with nightmares, many reoccurring, even now at 64 very often my wife wakes me up as I am thrashing about and screaming. I am usually being chased or attacked or someone’s trying to kill me.

I can cope if it’s not too often but sometimes I have many nights of awful sleep, keep waking and can’t get back to sleep, which causes awful low moods. My dilemma is; is it the bad sleep that cause the low moods or is it the low moods that cause the bad sleep. And low mood, I mean really low, not wanting to be on this planet. Some days I don’t feel safe driving as I have been so disturbed by my awful experience of the previous night, even though it’s only a dream it’s as though I have gone ten rounds in a boxing ring.

I am a logical person and try to see if there is a connection to any current events, there is no pattern.

I was referred to a sleep clinic wired up over night in hospital to be told I slept ok for a few hours but then awake, was given tablets to produce melatonin. They did not help at all so was told nothing else could be prescribed as I have a rare heart condition (Brugada), sudden death syndrome, or as I call it, mostly alive Syndrome. I have an ICD implant so this does not cause me any anxiety as I am lucky to have one.

Just to lighten it up, I will list the the things I have tried:

Mindfulness, yoga, tai chi, hypnotherapy, hypnosis, reflexology, many natural herbs, eating a light snack, going for a walk before bed. Blackout blinds, warm room, cold room, heavy quilt, light quilt.

I have bought many pillows - current one has a speaker built in to listen to relaxing stuff. I have lavender oil and all sorts of potions near my bed. We have had many mattresses, I even purchased a water bed many years ago, this was a big mistake although my wife loved it. When I was thrashing about the waves I caused nearly launched her off the bed. She loved it when I got out as they are cool in summer and warm in winter. We got rid when it developed a leak, oh dear a plumber with a leaking water bed you couldn’t make it up. We don’t have a TV in the bedroom or any electronic devices.

I usually go to bed around 10-10:30. I can sleep soundly until 2am then it can be dreadful, sometimes up at 3am or 4am. I try to stay in bed till 6am, but not very often.

I hear of people that when low stay in bed, for me I can’t stay in bed.

So just to recap, does the black dog cause bad sleep, or does the bad sleep cause the black dog to jump in the bed?

Have you found the secret recipe for a good night sleep?

Paul

A Moodscope member.

Ps. I once put my mobile under the pillow and it the morning it had disappeared. I think the Bluetooth fairy took it!