I'm having a bad day. I haven't had one in a while and I had forgotten just how bad it can be. When you feel like everything in the world is awful and life will never be good again.
At the moment it's a mix of things bringing me down, I have a lot going on in my personal life which I can usually manage most days, but sometimes it's the wider world that makes it all so overwhelming.
I know these bogs aren't supposed to be political, but at the moment the state of the world is making me despair. I work in news so I hear every day about terrible things that are happening all over the world, and while you do become a bit desensitised to it, some days it just all gets too much. Today it was the shootings in America. I can't stop thinking about all those people who were killed and questioning how there can be such evil at all levels of society in every corner of this world.
It makes me want to curl up under my duvet like a little child and hide from everyone and pretend none of it exists. How can we go about solving the world's problems? Surely it's too big a task for one person – and yet someone has to do something about it or how will we ever get out of this mess? Should I be doing more to try and right the wrongs of the world? Or is that a job for someone else?
The way I try to look at things (and it's much harder to do this on days like today) is that there is only so much one average person can do. There have been people throughout history, and people alive today, who are forces for change and work tirelessly to make the world a better place. I am not one of these people. What I can do it try to make life easier and happier for the small group of people around me (and myself!) by bringing as much light to the world as I am able to. When my dog greets me at the door when I get home from a harrowing shift, it makes me realise I am making a difference and bringing happiness to one life at least.
Not everyone can change the world, and sometimes it's okay to be average.
A Moodscope member.