To compare or not to compare.

Saturday May 14, 2016

When I was a child my parents would often tell me about Jenny who always kept her room tidy or Susan who would do household chores without being asked and without expecting money.

My parents would say that I should be like these wonderful girls. However when I mentioned that Penny had her own bedroom or that another friend was getting a new dress for her birthday, they would say that other children were not their concern.

I learnt from an early age that it was ok to compare but not to be compared.

From birth we are compared by weight, height, skills, which are judged by the earlier the better. In our adult years we may feel under pressure because we marry early, we are single, we have no children, we have too many children, we have our children when we are too young or too old. In our careers we may be compared to those who work harder, put their families first, who have more degrees or who work longer hours.

Even within the mental health community I compare myself to others. I admire people who, even though depressed, can write in depth articles or even books, whereas when I was low I could barely manage to lift a pencil or turn on the computer.

Why do us humans feel a need to compare ourselves to others and be worried when others compare us?

Should we take Shannon Adler's advice?

"Personality begins where comparison leaves off. Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud."

Do you compare yourself to others? How do you respond when people compare you to other people?

Do you celebrate your uniqueness? If so in what ways?

A Moodscope member.

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