Spock just came in from washing the car, smirking, full of himself. A neighbour, Pam, had been trying to get a concrete slab into the back of her car, with the help of a frail friend. He immediately stepped in to help. He's 12 years younger than me, and quite strong and fit .

Apparently Pam was most concerned though that he might have strained his back. "I hope you haven't hurt yourself, Val will blame me, and I wouldn't like to get on the wrong side of her!" Where did she get that idea from? 

Spock loves to paint this picture of me as a right old battle-axe. His Mum was a very placid, not to say timid, woman. His Dad once waited until she was out, then dug up her cherished rose garden to make room for a new caravan. She just went a bit quiet for a day or so.

He therefore has this image of me as a She Devil. Words like "fascist midget”, "Little dictator" have been used.

To be fair, there was a previous partner who called me Mrs Hitler. I very unfairly objected to his philandering, so that made me a tyrant of course.

I can't relate to this at all. I think I am a pussycat. I have been on the receiving end of so many personality assessments, but rarely recognise myself in any of them.

I once stepped down after several years organising a writer's group. My replacement was a bit nervous about taking over. Another member piped up "If a total airhead like Val can do it, anyone can.” I thought I had been very efficient.

Then again, in my time, I have variously been described as highly organised, shrewd business brain, like a silly teenager, a real egghead, strange and eccentric, woman's woman, man's woman. Set in my ways. Like a butterfly. Totally unfocused. I liked her on sight. I just can't take to her. Too soft with people. Hard as nails. Very independent. Too needy. Flighty.

Are you a complex creature, or does the feedback you have had from others usually match your own opinion of yourself?  

I am off to have it out with Pam next door. She's got some nerve talking about me like that. 

Val

A Moodscope member