Well, to be more accurate, it was last Sunday.
Many Moodscope blogs and comments advocate self-kindness. Yet many of us are all too familiar with the inner critic which taunts and heckles; that dismisses hope and diminishes enthusiasm and achievements. My own head voice tells me regularly and firmly how completely rubbish I am. And I believe it unconditionally.
So what caused this turnaround in thinking, in someone who is highly resistant to the notion that thoughts can be challenged and up-ended in a CBT kind of a way?
I've been frightened of flying for all of my adult life. And not just scared, but filled with absolute terror about the 'being trapped in so high up' issue to the point of wanting to escape and feel safe. Which really isn't helpful at 30,000 feet.
But there's a great big, beautiful world out there which, someday, somehow, I'd like to see and experience more of.
So on Sunday I joined about 100 other fearful flyers on a course which was designed to help us tackle our fears.
The day was filled with information, advice and the greatest support, but was also intense and quite emotional for me. Yet with much trepidation and a couple of false starts I boarded the plane that afternoon. We took to the skies and, instead of being filled with sheer terror, I thought how amazing it was to be high above fluffy white clouds infused with a golden glow from the winter sun. And how amazing we all were for being on that flight.
I don't think I've conquered my fears, but I've faced them head on and given them warning of my intentions. And maybe, just maybe, this new-found self-belief will filter its way into other areas of my thinking and my life.
But amazing doesn't just come in big, scary packages. Amazing is the blog which offers advice or insight into hard-earned experience when the writer might be going through the toughest of times. Amazing can be the comments which offer support, humour and understanding from afar. And most amazing of all, is everyone in the Moodscope community for simply hanging on in there.
A Moodscope member.
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