I returned from having a facial yesterday and mentioned to Spock that the therapist had to dose herself up with Ibuprofen, having just had her areolas tattooed. As usual, with anything that involves female vanity he looked stupefied, why would she do such a thing? I explained that she had breast reduction surgery in the past that had left just a semblance of nipples, minus the surrounding bit.

He wouldn't let it go, how had such a bizarre subject come up? I explained it's because she is trying online dating, and wants to be all prepped up, so to speak. I then spitefully added that she is having problems choosing though. She wants someone around her age, mid- 50's, but he absolutely must have a decent head of hair. She showed me the photos, and indeed most had a shiny bonce, like Spock.

Well, he was disgusted, "Oh, so  men are vilified for judging women for their looks, but it's ok for women to do that?" He says he's tempted to place his own profile on the app, "Very wealthy bald property developer, loves travel, dogs and the arts. Seeks woman for love and companionship. Must have own nipples.”

I do see his point. I know I am in the age bracket where my standards would be very different, not to say  negotiable, but she did seem to find fault with all of them, even those with hair. Reasons for rejection were things like gaudy shade of jacket, staring eyes, horrible sofa, possible mother in background, owns a bike. 

I liked the look of one guy in a hard hat, but she found fault with his hands. I had to agree they were strangler's hands.

Is this the way things are now, people having a shopping list of attributes that they will/won't accept. Of course I get it up to a point, we all have things that really matter to us, and physical qualities we find attractive or not. I could never be with someone who is into fanatical body-building for instance, a real turn-off for so many reasons. Rejecting someone because you don't like his sofa-come on!

Is this how things work now in real life? I doubt it. Go into your town, walk around and look at the couples. All shapes and sizes, some nondescript, some attractive, some with a face that only a mother could love. All managed to find a partner. You can't tell from a photo or description if a person has that something that will ignite a spark, if they are likeable, kind, share your values.

What do you think? Do people have unrealistic shallow expectations of what relationships are all about? 

Val

A Moodscope member