Three little words

8 Dec 2018

When I am struggling, I am depressed. Sometimes I'm angry. The blinkers come on and I see only a narrow tunnel. It seems the best way through is to put up my collar, stuff hands in pockets and bury my chin down. Be smaller. Be less.

A while ago, I found meditation a huge help. And then I let it tail off. I've reintroduced a daily practice but I've yet to reap the benefits anything like I had before. Perhaps it's just that the novelty has gone but I will stick with it. It's a crutch and I need one.

During my (guided) practice, I am often encouraged to choose whether I am 'thinking' or 'feeling' when I am distracted. I am encouraged to use one of those descriptions, very briefly, and then move back to listening for my breath. This ten minute, daily practice is to strengthen my mind and make a new pattern develop. The aim is so that when I am bombarded with distractions during my day, I might remember to do this and access the peace I so crave.

Using this limited vocabulary in the moment of meditation allows us to refocus quickly. But it has brought me to realise that I've also been using limited vocabulary when I think of my mood. And perhaps if I am more specific in my word choice it will shine a little light into corners where my demons are lurking. Maybe I could flush some of them out! I've had a little think. And I've decided that right now I am brave enough to admit that I am:

Sad. Confused. Lonely.

There we are. They are not the prettiest bunch and I look at them with neither inspiration nor admiration. But they are honest. And although I am not in any way ready to deal with them, now that I have labelled them, there is a glimmer of hope that I can use them as a mark in the sand.

Are you able today to choose your three little words? Sometimes writing them out takes away just a little of their power. And if you are in a good place, your three little words might just give us a rainbow to aim for.

Love from

The room above the garage

A Moodscope member

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.

Moodscope members seek to support each other by sharing their experiences through this blog. Posts and comments on the blog are the personal views of Moodscope members, they are for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice.

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