I wrote a blog long ago and was so thrilled to get comments back and apologise now for not at the time responding to anyone!!! I was very, very down and hadn’t the heart to reply. My situation is much the same but now I’m much older and I hope a little wiser.
My husband unexpectedly upped and left me when I was 65 and, since my previous blog, has married the much younger woman and life is still difficult for me. I’m now 75 and do regret being so damaged by the loss of my 32 year marriage that I didn’t attempt to meet another partner. This pandemic hasn’t been that much of a shock to me as I retreated quite a lot from living then, but am sorry now. This is our one shot at life and each wasted day will never return. I chatted to a man yesterday whose fiancé had died 5 years ago and he said he wasn’t complete as a single person. My answer surprised me - that he was fine and didn’t need to be a ‘couple’. I realised I have come a long way and I am actually ok now. I would of course prefer had things not changed but know I can’t change that and I’m now coping. My dear neighbour and friend died two years ago and I always promised I would take care of her dog.
So… for one who only liked big dogs, I now own a little ShihTzu and what a joy and total pleasure he is. So my view has changed too and I am accepting what good things like health and family and friends l have. I’ve recovered from breast cancer but now have a condition for which I need to take daily chemo tablets for ever but they are keeping things in check so again... I’m grateful. I’m sorry I didn’t complete more of my ‘bucket list’ but those dreams are just in hold until I can.
I’m so glad I’m the age I am as I have travelled extensively and seen such wonderful things and my dearest wish is that this awful pandemic time passes and my grandson and all children can grow up in a safe world and enjoy all the amazing experiences and places that I have been privileged to have had and seen. Keep safe and try to be as happy as you can... life is tough but so are we all deep down, we just need to keep hope.
A Moodscope member.
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