I usually avoid writing anything personal but thought I would share my thoughts on how a recent experience has led me to review my whole approach to life.
It all began a couple of months ago when a work colleague, I had considered to be a friend and whom I had nominated for a senior position in a voluntary organisation, turned on me when he did not get the role he coveted. This was simply due to a technicality because he had not followed the required procedures. When this was pointed out to him, he became even more furious and circulated the contents of my private emails to him. This caused me huge embarrassment and, I felt, seriously damaged my reputation as a senior and respected member of my profession.
My confidence has been shattered as a result leading me to question my judgement of people and my whole way of operating. I have always been a fairly open person with a tendency to freely share my thoughts on people and situations - without being malicious. The sort of chats one has with friends and colleagues over a drink.
Fortunately, people tend to have short attention spans and the focus of colleagues has moved on to other matters. However, I have been so shaken by the fallout I have withdrawn from many of my public activities. The main lesson I have learned is that emails can turn into destructive missiles and one has to be ultra careful about what one says, even in confidence. Think before you press ‘send’, if it is forwarded to others you have no way of controlling the wildfire which may be ignited.
A Moodscope member.